What is love?
It’s Valentine’s Day and while, yes, we know, that love should be shown every day of the week, for many February 14 is a very important day on the calendar, so we won’t rain on their parade, will we?
While Merriam-Webster defines love as 1. A feeling of strong or constant affection for a person. 2. Attraction that includes sexual desire: the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship. 3. A person who you love in a romantic way, I’ve asked a number of women to define for SheHUB what love means to them.
Although no two answers are alike, they all share a common sentiment…that love is supposed to make you feel like you are on top of the world.
Patricka Ferguson explains: “Love is the epitome of restoration. I recently watched a piece by TD Jakes’ daughter, and she was talking about walking into somebody’s life where they were having a famine and being the resource to get them out of the famine. I realised in that moment that that is exactly what love was. To show up, and to restore a part of something. To be the resource in something without any guarantee of anything in return. To just restore because that is what you were called to do…I feel that’s what love is.”SheHUB Magazine’s resident food columnist and curator of MyEagerEats Shay Gibbons says: “Love to me is an action. It’s acts of service. It’s doing even when you don’t want to. It’s honest but also protective. It’s the action of more than anything that can be said. If you show someone you love them it’s REAL.”
“Love is giving, love is kindness; it’s a degree of understanding,” reveals braid stylist Yewande Gafaar. “Love means sharing with someone despite your past. It’s the ability to open up to receive despite previous experiences. Love is more than a feeling but it’s what u feel and love is what you deserve despite what you’ve been through and what life has thrown at you.”
Cupping, hair loss and skin specialist Khadijah Julia Al Amiri believes that love is multifaceted: “Love is unconditional. It could be a strong connection, a bond, between a father and his child, a mother and her child. It could be sexual desires or physical attraction. And then there’s sisterhood. Love is supporting someone unconditionally and making them smile. Making them glow and an affirmation of it can be the physical—gifts, or looking out for one another; being there always, mentally.”Joi , a Mental Health Counsellor shares with SheHUB, “Love to me is a series of moments. Sometimes we are lucky enough to have it last someone’s lifetime and sometimes it’s just like a few moments and spaces, or a few months or a few years. It’s not something that’s absolute or guaranteed but it’s when you show up with a person or place in a space where a feeling jumps out of what you expect.
“The joy it brings you is something that is so uncontrollable that’s why it is love, and not to say that you act uncontrollably but that feeling that comes over you is something that is unique, and passionate.
It’s not something that you can fake or like try to recreate. It just is. It’s an existence and it’s beautiful and it makes you feel so good inside.”
“Theres a lot of things that love means to me,” says Real Estate Advisor Evelyn Darrell. “My family. My work that I am passionate about, the clients I get a chance to work with and build genuine connections with, and it also means food for me sometimes, too! I am a big foodie so I love eating and enjoying different meals. But above all, what love really means to me the most is God. Everything I have and everything I am is because of His unending love. So for me, that is what love is about and what love really is to me.”
Devonna Samuels of Marriage Motivation with the Samuels, explores what loves means to her as a wife: “Love means having a strong feeling towards your spouse. It also means being able to be there for someone, building your spouse up, reassuring them, affirming them, and encouraging them. I truly believe that anyone can say they love someone but I believe in actually showing that person you love them. When I think of love, I think of having this strong feeling, this affection towards my husband, being able to be by his side when he needs me the most. When he’s having a hard time I can show him I care for him in ways that no one else can. Love is being the person to motivate encourage and support him in his beliefs and what he chooses to do.”