There was an electricity in the air that I could not describe.
The moment I laid eyes on him years ago I thought he was the most beautiful specimen of a man I’d ever seen. Caramel skin, deep chocolate eyes. Slightly crooked front tooth. Absolute perfection. But he was married so I quickly put any possibilities of him and I out of my mind. Plus I wasn’t his type. Or so I thought. He was quiet and unassuming. I was always the life of the party–but you know what they say…opposites attract. We had a few mutual friends so would bump into each other in social settings now and then, but we exchanged nothing more than cordial “hellos” and went about our business.
Until the winter night we had the chance to connect. I can’t say where it was but I will say we both ended up sitting in his car and talking for hours; about our lives and our families. We discussed what we felt was missing from our lives and most of all, what we desired.
The whole time we never touched but instead we allowed our souls to connect. He shared deep hurts from his past and how it affected some of the things he did. I intently listened, holding on to each word.
Then he asked me: “Have you ever kissed with your heart?”
I didn’t know how to answer. No one had ever went that deep with me before.
“Ummmm, I think so,” I muttered.
He leaned in and kissed my forehead, then my cheeks and then my nose. Then said goodnight before driving away.
“What the hell just happened?” I asked myself. And then, “I want more. I need more.”
We never exchanged numbers so I would leave it up to change when we would see each other again. Two weeks later we got another opportunity. And without either of us saying a word we knew that we would not let another moment pass without fulfilling each other’s desire.
“I’m going to book us a room. Don’t tell me no. Just show up tomorrow at 4 p.m.,” he instructed. “Tell me what you like to eat and I will take care of the rest.”
I was hesitant, but I couldn’t say no. I would have been lying to myself. I wanted him as bad as he wanted me.
The next day at 1 p.m. I received a text which read: “Look in your mailbox. See you in a few hours.”
In it was an electronic room key. Moments later he texted me the room number.
I was so nervous when I walked down the hall…so many things ran through my head. The inevitable was going to happen…if I let it. I started to feel guilty because we were both cheating on our spouses, but then again, I didn’t care. It was only going to happen this once, I tried to convince myself.
He was in the room. I could smell his deliciousness before I could see him. He was looking out the bay window at the ocean. I wondered if he was having second thoughts like I was.
Within moments, he was kissing me gently. And then passionately. Nibbling on my ears, my neck, my breasts. I wanted him badly. There was no turning back.
Our bodies rocked in unison until we had no more energy. He was everything that I thought he would be and more. From his actions I could tell that he longed to be held just as much as I did. Our actions weren’t simply about sex, but there was a soulful connection that I cannot explain.
He held me in his arms until I fell asleep. Later, I was awakened by him yearning for round two, which I gladly obliged.
“This would be the first and last time,” I promised myself.
But it wasn’t. It was the first of many. Even to this day…two years later.
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