We need to talk about love. Why you may ask? Because love is more than just what you feel romantically for your significant other. Seriously. There are all kinds of love out there. And I’m not just saying this to make our single friends feel better. In fact, it may be more important to remind those peeps in a relationship with their soulmate that many other loves need attention, too. Like come up for air and tend to the other loves that grow in your garden, girl!
If you have a parent, grand, sibling, auntie, cousin or any other blood relative that checks in on you, then thank your lucky stars! Not everybody does or they don’t get along with the family they do have. While we may get annoyed with the people who have known us since we didn’t even know ourselves, it’s truly a bond that is priceless.
These are the people that have had a hand in you becoming the person you are. They hurt when you hurt and soar with you when you soar. The point is: don’t take them for granted. They’re your biggest cheerleaders. It’s time to check in on them. Even if you have nothing exciting to say. Especially if you have nothing exciting to say. They enjoy the connection; not just the highs and lows.
You may think that I am stating the obvious and hopefully, I am. However, when you have a bestie, you have unconditional support. A wing woman, a sounding board, a secret keeper and more. They’re the person that you can ugly cry in front of and will bring you flowers and your favourite carb. You can cancel on them at the last minute and they won’t hold it over your head for five years. You can give one look and they will rescue you from any situation.
They get you. Whether they live across the country, in the town over or even in the same apartment, you can reach out at 2 a.m. and they will listen.
Friendship allows one of you to be strong when the other feels less than. Friendship allows you to have honesty with no ulterior motives.
Friendship is a playground for your silly self to have playdates and sleepovers forever! You’ve got each other’s hand each other’s back. So don’t forget to say it!
Weird one. Hear me out. Most of us have a passion. And for most of us that happens in the in between spaces. The times that get squeezed in. After work, after dinner, after soccer practice, after the gym, after the dentist appointment. After. After. After. Until the passion we had for singing, sewing, hiking, painting, learning French, starting a podcast….you get the picture…until that passion is so pushed down into the in between that it never sees the light of day.
If you had a day to yourself, really to yourself, with no commitments, everything you are always responsible for is taken care of…what would you spend your time doing that you used to love? Aah, there it is. Now go do more of that.
You saw this coming, right? And it sounds so cheesy to say that you have to love yourself in order to love others. So let me say it another way. You have to give yourself the same attention, tending and pampering that you bestow to everything else. It doesn’t have to be elaborate expensive spa days (but that’s fine too). It does need to be consistent. Stop and check in with yourself. What do you need? It could be physical like a haircut or a nap. It could be emotional like needing time to reflect on a big decision or just decompress from a hard day. It could be mental like needing a new coping strategy or talking out anxiety with a professional.
The point is that self-care has become the butt of a lot of jokes, but (see what I did there?) you really can’t take care of your priorities, whether they be goals or people, if you’re running on a low battery. Consider this permission to take care of yourself.
There are lots of other versions of loves out there. Feel free to comment below to share another one. And please be sure to share your love with any and all this month and beyond!
Nicole Klett is a National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach located in the United States. She is certified by the National Board of Medical Examiners and has worked with hundreds of clients to reach their health goals. She is also a writer who enjoys topics that are related to self-care whether that be sharing tips for healthier eating or for the next book or movie to check out.